What guys are thinking but never say.


Screen Shot 2013-03-21 at 08.53.04I just found a fun little article from last year published at (Parenting.com) drawn from married men with children in the household. Here are the first three results, I’ll publish the others later.

“I want to cuddle.”

Sometimes, we stagger home from work and it feels as though we have just done 15 rounds with Mike Tyson. To be very honest what we really, really need is not gymnastic sex (straight away) but just a loving cuddle.  No words, no solutions – just cuddles.  Now if one thing leads to another fair enough, but to be very honest undemanding cuddles are so welcome.

“Take charge in bed. Please?”

We know that on your list of jobs somewhere between hoovering and the dishwasher is “do sex with hubby”, which is fine.  Marital sex is sometimes dutiful, as well as sometimes sparkingly exciting.  However, we feel like we make so many overtures of interest, so many little squeezes, lingering pecks, sort of carrying around the unending question; “would now be a good time?” all the time like wearing a big hat with “would now be a good time?” written on it in big letters.  This can make sex for us a responsibility, as we endlessly seek the hormonal moment!  So, just once in a while, plan ahead take some initiative and surprise us with a lingering kiss, a sexy brush past or even just talk to us about times you have loved being sexy with us.  This may make you feel awkward or embarrassed, but hey who cares.  We are important aren’t we?

“I’m fed up with date night.”

Routine, routine routine.  We hate too much routine.  Raising children and earning money involves quite a bit of routine, so please, please, don’t regularise our date nights too.  I want our infrequent nights out to be aspiring to spontaneity. This means if we order a special bottle of wine, then enjoy the excitement, don’t mention the family budget. We are in that moment trying to create a special me and you moment within the cascade of family life. It’s not about spending money necessarily, we would be just as happy with a special picnic or a late night movie – anything that is more spontaneous than predictable.  So please, let’s have some unplanned fun.

More soon.

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